Jul 27th 2003 at 03:23:49 PM
lisa bonnell
England
went on to a eating disorders web site
i am 23 now with a 1 year old son .i had a very bad eating disorder, my lowest was 3 stone 13 pounds. I still get times when i get scared to eat. it's nice to hear from such a lot of people with it.
Jul 23rd 2003 at 05:29:41 PM
EDDIE
PENNSYLVANIA
ME
I MISS YOU SO SO MUCH. I HAVE A VERY HARD TIME STAYING STRONG, MY MIND IS ALWAYS A MESS, MOST SAY I'M NOT THE SAME PERSON, WHICH I KNOW I'M NOT AND NEVER WILL BE. LOVE YOU LITTLE SISTER.
Jul 23rd 2003 at 11:04:06 AM
Dad
Dear Button: 31 years ago today at 10:35 AM you brought so much joy and happiness to everyone by being born. Words can not express the deep pain and sorrow we all have from you dieing so early in life. I only hope others who visit your clouds realize just how deadly anorexia - bulimia really is and not let it kill them or someone they love as it killed you. Knowing the day will come when I can once again hold you in my arms, Love & Miss you Deeply, Dad
Jul 18th 2003 at 03:07:24 PM
Cheyenne
Canada
Via the Anorexic Web
God Bless Shanda
I have been suffering from Anorexia and
Bulimia for about 3-4 years now and I don't know what to do. This site is a lot of help. Very positive in getting across the message that this disease can and does kill.
Keep up the good work and I hope to be able to visit the site more often now.
Jul 13th 2003 at 05:18:55 AM
Ashley
Michigan
I was watching Dr. Phil, and I saw this girl on an "Anorexic Web" site. So i looked for it and i found a link to this site.
I'm 16 and i have been trying to overcome anorexia/bulimia for the past two years. It seems like
every time it goes away, it comes back 5 times worse than it was before. I know I'm
really hurting my mom because she doesn't know what to do. I act very angry when someone questions me on my strange eating habits (I.E. Fasting for ten days at a time and eating nothing during that period). Even though I react angrily when someone tries to talk to me about it, i just want to scream "HELP ME", yet i continue to deny that there is anything wrong with me. I know that there is something terribly wrong.
i used to weigh 235lbs at the age of 12 and 13. I started making myself sick to lose weight, but as i dropped pounds and sizes, i kept telling myself "Just one more size. Just ten more pounds."
I am now 5'9" and i weigh 128 pounds. I look fat to myself, but i keep saying "Don't be stupid.
There is no possible way you can be fat when everyone else is telling you you're way too thin." Even so, i can't stop. It's like i thrive on this vicious cycle. Some days, i can feel my body begging for nourishment, but i don't respond. My doctor said that my urine shows that my body is breaking down its
proteins, and if i don't stop this i will have to go to In-Patient Care (Or something). I'm very
frightened, but i don't know what to do. I don't even know how i let it go this far. I feel like
I'm trapped. My mom is now aware of my eating disorder and is monitoring my food intake and watching me for two hours after i eat (Doctor's orders). What they don't realize is: in doing this, it makes me angry and i just want to hurt myself even more. I've tried for two years to give this eating disorder up by myself and i have failed because every time it comes back,
I become more attached to it. I really don't know how to make it stop. And worse,
I'm not sure i want to give it up yet. It's like a part of me, and without it, i would feel like a part of me is missing.
Jul 11th 2003 at 01:47:21 AM
Julie
Naperville, Illinois
a bad web site
I want to thank the creators of this web site and to say how sorry I am for your loss. Because of this site and alot of things that have been building up I am asking my therapist for a referral to a long term treatment center for my anorexia. I have it for 25+ years I am 34 years old and I want to say thank you Julie
Jul 5th 2003 at 08:16:49 AM
Dad
Dear Button: Four years ago today you left us. Though you may not be with me physically, you are always in my thoughts. One day we will be together and I will once again be able to hug you. Love and Miss you Deeply, Dad
Email
Jul 1st 2003 at 09:12:33 PM
KristyBass
West Haven, Utah
a link from my councilor's website- centerpoint-utah.com
To all you dear people who are suffering with this
horrible thing called a eating disorder,
I have read your messages. And I am deeply sorry that you are suffering. I suffered for 7 years. But that was 7years to long. Three months ago, I got some reel help. I went
inpatient. Even though it was the hardest thing to do, because of it I have recovered and am
slowly regaining all the thing's I lost. I lost my job, my friends, my favorite past time-Dance, the
ability to just walk around the mall and shop. Because I chose to starve myself I lost the thing's I loved. I can not make any one recover or get help, but i can tell you that no matter what kind of eating disorder you have, you are risking your life, and it is
possible to recover. I thought I had to loose weight even though I knew I was thin. But I got to my lowest weight of 81 pounds at 5'4 and 20 years old. How I lived, I do not know. I looked
awful. My eyes were dull and slowley sinking, my ribs were sticking out, and it hurt to
wear a belt because it dug into my fragile bones. I lost what little mussel I had. I couldn't stand or walk for more then a hour with out filling like I was going to fall flat on my face. I lost my friends because they didn't want to watch me die. Even though I said I couldn't die. I was knocking on death's door. Death
luckily didn't answer. All I can say is you all need help if you think you are fine.
If anyone wants to talk fill free to e-mail me. I know how hard it is, and how alone you can fill.
Jun 21st 2003 at 05:04:40 AM
Dania Guerrera
Sydney - Australia
Have been reading and surfin the net
I should be me in this girls shoes - she had everything to live for - not me i am nothing - I'm fat & ugly - she should not have gone - life's not fair.
My prayers are with you & your family darling - one day we might meet up where the stars are shining bright !! if anyone feels like i do or if anyone wants to chat to me pls contact me - would love to hear from you !!
Jun 21st 2003 at 05:02:53 AM
Dania Guerrera
Sydney - Australia
Have been reading and surfin the net
I should be me in this girls shoes - she had everything to live for - not me i am nothing - I'm fat & ugly - she should not have gone - life's not fair.
My prayers are with you & your family darling - one day we might meet up where the stars are shining bright !!
May 8th 2003 at 06:25:24 AM
Samantha
Indianapolis Indiana
I was looking for an anorexic website to do information on
My name is samantha and I am in seventh grade at Perry Meridian Middle School and I am doing a project in science and I got anorexia. I think this website it sweet, and sad. I feel bad for shanda's family and her. I hope you will accept my sympathy. I will visit this site for as long as I can, thank you for letting me have a voive of opinion!
May 6th 2003 at 06:24:20 PM
Lindsay Nicole Payne
West Mansfield Ohio
Anorexic web
I'm a senior at Ridgemont high school in Ridgeway and I picked to do my senior research paper on anorexia and bulimia and I never realized that allot of people deal with it and that you have a great website and that
I'm sorry for your lost. I think that i need to lose weight and but i would never try or become
anorexic. I think what your doing will help others who have a problem.
God bless.
May 6th 2003 at 11:59:13 AM
Michelle
The Midlands, England
A friend showed it to me
I just want to say how beautiful this site is. I have been told I have anorexia/bulimia.
I am still in the "yeah, whatever" stage. I wont believe anyone who tells me that I have an eating disorder but I am getting help. I have consented to go into a special hospital to help me overcome my depression and the eating disorder I am told I have.
Shanda's story, it is so lovely and I now miss her even though I never knew she ever existed before seeing this site.
God bless you all who set up this wonderful site and God bless Shanda
May 2nd 2003 at 08:27:22 PM
Jessica
WI
Looked up Anorexic
I am 14 years old, and my best friend is anorexic
. She's been in a hospital in St.Paul or Minneapolis, MN, I can't remember. She has been there for almost two months, I know that for many that is a very short time. But the worst part was was that we-my friends and I- didn't know what to do so we just watched it happen. When we went swimming, I had to look away because I thought I would be sick she was so skinny, you could see her ribs, and her hip bones, and her diaphragm, it was horrible, i know it probably doesn't sound like much but i had no idea it could be that bad. I was scared, I know many people were worse off, I was 13 and didn't know what was wrong with her. She weighed 100lbs. at 14yrs. and 5'7". Now she's home, but she's not any better. She puts things in her pockets so that she could weigh more when she went to the doctors . My best friends are cutting and scratching themselves, even my anorexic friend is. I will not name any one-even though it would be easier. I don't know what to do
....
I am scared for her and my friends, I don't have any one to talk to....I want her to get better!! If any one wants to email me, I would greatly appreciate it. If you would tell me your story, or help me talk about this Stupid disease, or help me learn more about it and helping my friend. If you have anysuggestions on how to stop my friends from hurting themselves, i would be ever greatful. My email is Lucky_chik@hotmail.com
(I'm srry if i can't spell)
Apr 23rd 2003 at 12:18:58 AM
liz
im 19 years old, and i have been struggling with bulemia/anorexia for almost 4 years now. this site brings me to tears, because i read everyones comments, and so many of these girls are so young. I am currently in recovery, but i am unfortunatly not cured. each day it is harder and harder for me to get better, and i know that there are so many people out there with the same struggle. My only wish would to make all the people with eating disorders better, because sadly, i cant bring back the last 4
years. I missed alot of things, and now, my only hope is to help anyone who needs to talk, i know i could have used this website 4 years ago , maybe i would have thought twice...to everyone out there who is struggling, never give up....
Apr 3rd 2003 at 07:53:12 AM
Melissa
Breaking the Cycle
Overcoming Eating Disorders
MIdwest USA
searching and surfing
Shanda was (is) a very beautiful woman and her story made me cry. I was hard core ana/bulimic (bounced between the two) for seven years and am now pretty much "recovered" and married with a 15 month old and another little boy on the way. I thank God everyday that I was able to find the courage and strength to overcome this thing that could've killed me...and it's my prayer that no one else would have to die from this...because you CAN recover!
May you rest in peace now, Shanda...
Mar 26th 2003 at 09:22:18 AM
Anonymous Surfer
I thought this website was so inspiring and beautiful. god bless.
0
Mar 20th 2003 at 07:22:52 PM
Kimberley
Australia
This is the MOST beautiful site I've ever seen. It made me cry. I'm trying to find some inspiration...some strength....I think I'm heading down the road of an eating disorder. I've been bulimic for a while now, and lately, I've been not eating at all. I'm scaring myself. I am getting help, and I really do want to get better. THere are so many things I want to do with my life...I want to have kids and get married, and be an old lady so I can dye my grey hair purple....seeing that Shanda didn't get to do that makes me so sad, and evokes a feeling in me I've never felt before. It gives me a sense of power, and helplessness at the same time. It gives me a little more strength to fight.
So my fight is for Shanda!!!
I'll do it for her.
Kimxxxx
Mar 15th 2003 at 12:34:52 PM
Traci
California
Anorexic Web
My heart goes out to Shanda's Family. I know eating disorders put families through hell...I am so very sorry for your loss. I wanted to thank you for taking the time and making this web site. I hope that it will help others realize that there is help out there. I myself can say now that I am in recovery from seven years of eating disorder hell. There is hope and there is help. I would have never even thought that life could be so wonderful. Not to say that I don't have bad days, but life is just bad I have thing to look forward to. I can take the good with the bad. I was always searching for something that wasn't there...and now I can truly say that I experience joy within. God Bless everyone.
Mar 12th 2003 at 05:43:25 PM
Desperately Looking for answers
Searching the web
Hi, well, I don't know what to say really... I'm just looking for some ways to help a friend who is, I think, suffering from anorexia. I am 15 years old and I am very afraid for my friend who is 103 pounds and is about 5'5". She is almost 17 and she barely eats. She continues to say she needs to lose weight. Im afraid she is goin overboard. She is always saying she is hungry, but refuses to eat more than crackers and water at lunch. She wont go and talk to anyone about it, because she is afraid they will make her eat. I just feel so helpless in this situation. I want to help her in every way I can, but I dont want to go about it in a way that she will act negatively towards it. There is more to this story... but for now I jus need some advice on what to say, or possibly even do. She worries me.
sincerely,
A Friend Desperately Looking for answers
Mar 5th 2003 at 10:56:53 AM
Alison Lysakowski
Belleville, IL
Search engine
Anorexia and bulimia are SO serious and should be treated at the first sign...before it's too late. You could live your whole life not knowing your best friend goes through it, too...sad.
Feb 28th 2003 at 07:37:08 PM
Lil Jen
My Website
Huh?
Canada
Anorexic Web
I have never been anorexic but I tried to lose weight but I can't I just don't lose weight !I don't even try to.
Feb 23rd 2003 at 12:27:04 PM
Georgia
Shanda's Clouds
Hi Nikki and everyone else who leaves a message for help and no e-mail address. You have to talk to someone as you can not get over Anorexia and Bulimia like you can the Flu. Contact me at my email address if you do not want to talk to you family or friends or spiritual leader. Shanda & I do not want you to DIE.....
Feb 21st 2003 at 05:26:11 PM
Nikki
Ask Jeeves
hi, im 15 and my name is Nikki
Last Year i was bulimic for 4 months, throwing up everything that went in to me, i lost almost 47 pounds, over the summer i gained it al back and then some, i have started throwing up again, i wanna be skinny, but i dont wanna do it like this, please help me, but
don't tell me to tell someone i don't want to tell anyone im to scared
Feb 3rd 2003 at 12:10:29 PM
Kassandra A.
St. Joe/ Dowagiac Michigan
anorexic web
I feel horrible about what has happened. I often worry about whether or not I am thin enough. My friends and family see that I dont eat enough. I feel fat all of the time. My freinds and family say that I am not but how can the mirror lie? When I look in the mirror all I see is fat. I hate myself and feel disgusting. I cant stand to see myself in the mirror. I weigh myself daily and if I gain even a half a pound I will not eat for the next two days. Or until I am below my former weight. I really
don't want to end up like her. I just dont know what to do.
Kassandra
Jan 29th 2003 at 12:21:32 PM
Victoria
Ontario,Canada
Anorexic Web
I find sites like these really work to teach young people to think about the decisions they make. Thank you for making it
Jan 22nd 2003 at 05:12:19 PM
Just another girl ll
Canada
Anorexic Web
'Just another girl'-I know what you're going thorough somewhat. Things are a little different with me, i am somewhat anorexic, or at least i used to be. im not sure if i have gotten over it yet. People tease me about it all the time, and i don't know what to do. My friends at school always comment on me eating, and it makes me not want to eat at all. My best friend was like 'i wrote you a poem' and i thought that was so nice, i opened the piece of paper, and at the top it said "Starve" i was so crushed by it. My brother and sister wont let me live it down either. My brother was throwing food at me saying 'don't eat this you'll get fat' this hurts me so much. people can be so cruel weather you're thin or not. Don't let them get you down please. Its not great to be treated like me, and i know you don't feel great either. The girls that tease you only do it because they have low self esteem they need to do it to make themselves feel better, and the boys well who cares. they're not everything. I bet you're a great person. Sometimes life hurts no matter who you are. Please get better and stay healthy xxx
Jan 21st 2003 at 12:10:39 AM
Jennifer
Rapid City SD
Looked it up from Jarves
I saw a movie on Lifetime about Anorexia and it really scared me to think that there are millions of men and women who have this disorder. I read her story here and it is terribly sad that she passed so young. I wish these young peole and older people with this disorder would realize that they are not fat or ugly, that they are so beautiful inside and out and that there's help before it could be too late. If you read this and you have a disorder, don't be scared to do something about it and GET HELP IMMEDIATELY! It could save you life!You can still be healthy and beautiful and eat. Good Luck to you all. May God help you and bless you.
Jan 20th 2003 at 12:48:33 PM
Emily
England
anorexia web
I came onto this site because i am very worried about my best friend who i believe to have anorexia. This site is very touching and has helped my friend come to terms with her anorexia. She is now gradually getting better. This is a wonderful site and has helped us greatly. Much love and thanks to all who made the effort in making it and to the beautiful woman who the site is dedicated to. x x x
Jan 18th 2003 at 09:28:00 PM
JUST ANOTHER GIRL
OUTSIDE USA
IM CRYING I FEEL SO SAD AND I KNOW IM ALONE ,I'VE BEEN ANOREXIC FOR MORE THAN 5 YRS ,IM 17 ,BUT WHEN ALL STARTED I WAS VERY FAT AND EVERYBODY HATES ME EVEN ME ,GUYS INSULTED ME AND CALLED ME WITH HORRIBLE NAMES ,ONE DAY ONE GIRL TOLD ME ,YOU ARE TOO UGLY ANDO TOO FAT TO LIVE KILL YOURSELF ,AND SHE TOLD IT WHERE EVERYBODY HEARD,I FELT HUMILLATED.
THEREīS NOWAY OUT
I DONīT WANT TO DIE,BUT I DONT WANT TO BE FAT AGAIN, I DON'T WANT TO BE HUMILLATED AGAIN I DONīT WANT ANYBODY SPITTING ON MY FACE. I FEEL DESPERATED.
Jan 15th 2003 at 05:34:42 PM
Anonymous Surfer
How provocatively peachy. Though extremely excruciating.
Jan 12th 2003 at 10:48:16 PM
BRITTANY
KY
ANOREXIC WEB
I have been anorexic for 4 years and I am now 16 and doing extremely well with fighting it. Shanda was so beautiful and if she was alive today I bet she would have been even more beautiful. Because of this site I want to get help and not relapse again. May God be with u all I know Shanda is..
with love to all
Jan 10th 2003 at 10:05:20 PM
Barb Murvihill
Chicago
I'm 32 and have had bulimia/ exercise bulimia since 1986. I was also an athlete. I looked at Shanda's photo's and for a spilt second wished I could be "ana'. Then I'd be REALLY thin. I'm going inpatient soon so I can finally beat this monster. Shanda was lovely. Eating disorders are evil. You are in my prayers. Barb.
Dec 31st 2002 at 09:26:27 AM
BETTY WISEMAN
INDIANA
I WAS HELPING MY DAUGHTER DO A PROJECT FOR SCHOOL
TO THE FAMILY ,
MY PRAYERS ARE DAILY WITH YOU ALWAYS REMEMBER GOD IS ALWAYS IN CONTROL OF GOOD TIMES AND BAD SO WHEN YOU LOOK TO HIM HE'LL HELP YOU GET THROUGHT THIS . MY HEART POURS OUT TO HER FAMILY GOD BLESS YOU ALL . TILL YOU MEET AGAIN GOD BLESS.
Dec 25th 2002 at 08:37:44 AM
Dad
Dear Button: It is another Christmas without your physical presents being near me and oh how all of us do miss not being able to give you a hug and telling you how much we Love You. I can only hope that those who do visit your Clouds realize just how deadly eating disorders are and do get help. Your Spirt lives on honey. I hope to have it set up that your Clouds live on - long after I come to be with you. Love & Miss you dearly, Dad
Dec 21st 2002 at 05:57:18 AM
EDDIE
Pennsylvania
My sister..another Christmas is here without you. Everything is ok here, as you already know I did take everyones advice and went and talked to someone. And to be honest with you...it didn't help! I truly believe that nothing will, if my telephone would ring and I would hear, Hey Eddie..How are you, on the other end I would be doing alot better. But I see you and speak with you everyday and that eases my mind. But like I have said before, people say time heals all wounds, I say ......false.
Love you and miss you so much.
Dec 18th 2002 at 04:58:16 PM
Lisa
Arizona
Link
this is a beautiful site...my heart aches for anyone out there who knows someone with an eating disorder. if you are someone who is struggling, don't let it take your life away from you...I know 2 people that died from an eating disorder, and I myself almost died. don't let this be you. take care of yourself, and don't take what you have for granted, because you never know when everything will change. love yourself for who you are, not what you look like. eating disorders DO NOT discriminate, so be aware. my heart goes out to all of you, and to Shanda's family and friends.
Love,
Lisa
Dec 11th 2002 at 02:25:16 PM
Carolanne
Petawawa, Ont
link
My heart goes out to you.
I was just wondering if I could use parts of this story for my project on anorexia? Its fo rthe awareness and prevention of this awful psychgologial disorder.
THNX
Nov 28th 2002 at 08:22:28 AM
Colleenie
Syracuse NY
Shanda/Georgia
Just wanted to say Happy Thanksgiving to you!! U know this was our
day. LOL We used to go for a Bagel and coffee every T-day morning. Miss Ya!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!You are still and always will be in my heart and mind!! MUAHS GIRLFRIEND
ABOVE! That is the closest thing to a wolf. .LOL The butterfly is from Kyrsten Love ya
shawanda!
Nov 22nd 2002 at 08:54:56 PM
Georgia Ballem
B.C. Canada
friend told me about it
I think it is vary kind of you to share your sisters tragic story to inspire others to realize you dont have to be thin to fit in, and to just be yourself, i think that you will be able to help many people by warning them about the dangers of e.d. i myself havent had to deal with anyone close who suffers with this horrible disease, i know that horribly enough i myself have thought of it just never followed through (thankfully), but sites like this have made me remind myself that its not what other people think of me but what i think of myself.its so sad that people actually think that they have to care what other people think of them.
God Bless You Shanda,
yours truly Georgia Ballem, 13
Nov 20th 2002 at 05:31:11 PM
Colleenie
Syracuse, NY
Shanda:-)
I am so pleased as to the response from this site. Shanda and I were best friends, and I am so glad her fate may make a difference in someone else's life. Don't stay quiet, if U feel someone you know has this disease put it right out on the table, it can be fatal. I miss yah shawanda Bear!!
Nov 20th 2002 at 09:17:11 AM
The Anorexia Bulimia Net
A website dedication to the prevention, awareness and treatment of eating disorders.
South Carolina
This is a great website....keep up the good work! Shanda's story has touched me deeply, keep maintaining this website as you have.
-The Anorexia Bulimia Net
Nov 17th 2002 at 10:14:56 PM
Denae Doyle
femimage
My heart goes out to you, the parents of Shanda. Thank you for your good work. Having owned and operated a modeling school, I have seen the harm done by the unrealistic expectations the media puts upon all of us to be thin. Keep up your meaningful work.
Blessings,
Denae Doyle-Izett
Nov 17th 2002 at 07:21:29 PM
steffi
Maryland
I was so very touched by this tribute to such a beautiful young lady. I feel such a sense of sadness for the future that Shanda will never have. I have been battling anorexia/bulimia for most of my life and was finally struck by this site. I am of the same age and am thankfully afraid for myself enough to continue my recovery. The most meaning ful thing for me was what was written under her picture from 1998.."I fell-cracked a rib and could not throw up...How I wish that rib never would have healed. I would still be with the ones I love." I am on my second round of broken ribs. I have osteoporosis. The first time a few years ago did nothing to wake me up to the fact that I was becoming brittle, so I continued on with my anorectic rituals. Now here I am again broken and in pain reading this and for the first time I feel like something is reaching out to me. I know I was not in a place before to have these word affect me..but now they resonate in my head and I know that I have found this site at a turning point for me. I am forever greatful to whomever created it, as I feel indebted to you. I know now I might actually have the strength I have been looking for inside.
Nov 17th 2002 at 03:25:42 PM
Emslie
Guelph, Ontario
link
I'm personally trying right now to fight anorexia. I came here to get strength to continue my fight, this is one of the biggest uphill battles I've ever faced.
Nov 13th 2002 at 07:43:01 PM
Claire
Pittsburgh, PA
I looked it up
Hi I'm Claire...And looked up anorexic on google cause I wanted to remind myself of what I shouldn't do. Well I feel very bad after reading her story and I red the whole thing and it was just so sad. I think it is very good that people put reminders like this to other youth and anyother person to remind them that it is true, you can die from it.
Much luv-
Claire
Nov 13th 2002 at 06:16:24 AM
Tammy & Gemma
Chatham, Kent. England.
We had to do research for P.H.S.E at School
We think it is really sad about what has
happened to that girl - she was so pretty.
Everyday we come to school and we all look at pages in magazines and websites about all these
beautiful people that are skinny.
But to be honest, the beauty is on the inside, not the out.
And so what if your fat or skinny, your still beautiful - unless you have a crap personality !!
Love you Loads
Tam & Gemma
Nov 12th 2002 at 11:16:46 AM
Jamie
Kamloops, B.C, Canada
link
i feel so bad for anyone who has to go through this deadly disease. It is a toxic thing to go through. anyone who is ever bulimic or anarexic or is even thinking of becoming should realy read this story it may be the difference between life and death.
best wishes
god bless
jai
Nov 11th 2002 at 06:22:54 PM
Sarah
NV
Everything here is very touching and sad and im
sorry to all of those who have to deal with this problem day by day, but I've definitely
been through the worst of this and i know that's not all because im 16, and i look back just three years ago and think "13 is too young to have to deal with these problems"...yet that was me, and ever since then i've kept it inside, unable to tell a soul. My weight varies, im not what people say i am, people tell me im crazy but how can a mirror lie? please help
me. someone
;
Nov 7th 2002 at 03:22:15 PM
Kayla Kruse
Lanarl, IL
my friend sammy sent me links to sites like this cuz of my eating dis order
Hello~ i am 14 and when i was 13 i weighed 142.8 lbs 5'2 ive alwys been the "Fat one"a dn i decided to change it i just turned 14 the 17th of october and i am now 128lbs i was down to 100 then i stopped and ate agian and now im starting up cuz i am soo fat i cant stop it and i hope that maybe you will watch over me and help me. im sorry you had to die even though i didnt know you i still feel for you...i hope to some day see you in heaven......i hope i dont die of this disease though....im trying to stop but its soo hard.....
with love kayla
Nov 5th 2002 at 08:21:23 AM
Shirl
With Love For My Daughter
Memorial for my beautiful 17 year old daughter
Canada
Link
I lost my beautiful 17 year old daughter Chantel to an eating disorder. Maybe you are with her in heaven. We miss her so much and tried everything to help her. Please don't let this horrible eating disorder monster take your life away. Get help! Talk to someone! Love yourself!
Our life is empty now without our girl.............Hugs, Shirl
;
Nov 2nd 2002 at 06:07:20 PM
amber
CALIFORNIA
HEY EVERYONE! I WAS DOING SOME RESEARCH ON E.D AND I CAME ACROSS THIS WEBSITE... IT MAKES ME HURT WHEN I HEAR STORYS FROM PEOPLE W/ THESE KINDS OF PROBLEMS. IF YOU DO NOT HAVE A PROBLEM YOU SHOULD BE VERY THANKFUL BECAUSE I AM VERY THANKFUL THAT I AM FINE!! GOD BLESS YOU ALL
Oct 30th 2002 at 05:08:26 PM
An Angel
canada
through another angel
i wuz anorexic myself but i
stopped b/c i have seen wut it does to you know i never knew that beautiful young lady that is on this web
site, but for all of you out there that is or is thinking bout bein ana then pleez take into consideration that you can die...ppl have died from this n i may not kno you but me myself wuz bout 1 hour away from death from ana ,so
please don't do it pleez,you shouldn't have to worry bout your weight,
your life is to short to make it shorter!!!
luv ya'll,An Angel
Oct 27th 2002 at 07:15:51 AM
SERENA
TEXAS
I like how the caption for this message is "Last Words". I am a former anorexic. I never thought I would put myself through that again, especially because after recovering I weighed more than I did before I was anorexic. Anyway, I'm thin right now without starving, but I stupidly wonder what it did feel like to be anorexic again. I was depressed, but I felt real. I felt like any positive thought that
occurred in my mind was just a blunt denial to how horrible I am. I want to see what others see; not what I wish to be. I guess anorexia gave me some power. And if I couldn't have anyone actually care for ME, at least I could know that I'm
thinking of me.
I won't become anorexic again. I just wonder, and I could really relate to this website, thank you.
Oct 13th 2002 at 07:08:03 AM
Anna
Sweden
I have been fighting aginst my anorexia for eight yeras, sine the early age of ten. Your clouds made me think twice about giving in...I love to met you in heaven, but not for amny years.
Oct 5th 2002 at 06:45:38 PM
Nicole
a far away and non-knowing friend
NJ
I dont even know what to say... i always say that i am better off dead that alive, being fat (even though people tell me i am crazy)... but they don't see what i see everyday. I now see that i am not. I read her story and its like she is hear with me telling me. I dont want to be gone, just thin, why can't i be pretty and what they all want? to much for a 19 year old to handle...
Oct 2nd 2002 at 10:40:12 AM
Anna & Jackie
Shandas
SORRY
Sep 28th 2002 at 05:58:22 PM
Drew
ChangingLINKS.com
good job on your site!
We link to sites that have new information and entertainment.
Hopefully, we can exchange links!
Please visit http://www.ChangingLINKS.com suggest your link.
Sep 20th 2002 at 05:50:33 PM
tim
Green Bay, Wisconsin
Hey everyone, I was doing some research on E.D... and I came accross this site. It's just incredible how hard it can be for people to fight this. I can't exactly say i know what you guys are going through, but i have had a taste of it through personal experience and through my many friends. I just want you all to know, you arn't alone in this, there are people out there that can, and will help you.
Sep 12th 2002 at 02:45:34 PM
"Irish Amethyst"
ED Hell
My story of struggling with/recovery from an eating disorder
Ireland
I love the music on this site - so sad, but yet, appropriate. I am currently in recovery from an eating disorder (how I hate those words), but do not know whether or not full recovery is possible. I want to fight this, but yet, going back seems so tempting, especially now, when so many painful things are coming up for me - not fun!
Sep 8th 2002 at 03:27:47 AM
Susan
family
West Virginia
Shanda, you were always dear and close to me. I now have a eating disorder, in the last month I have lost 22 pounds. I may only eat a bite of something. I can't eat a whole meal, for I get sick. I never thought I would ever get like this, and now I am getting scared. I pray that God helps me get through this so I can become that healthy person again. I miss you so much
Aug 25th 2002 at 08:27:42 PM
Sarah
hi, i've been struggling with bulimia and anorexia since the end of 8th grade and im going to be a junior this fall. It's very hard to deal with and nobody knows which makes it even harder. You can tell by looking at my wrist i hate life, and i know i have changed..i know i need help, but i dont want it. Someone please, please help me
Aug 21st 2002 at 12:29:18 PM
Leigh
Devon, UK
This story is very touching, but what do you do when you can only either starve or binge and when you feel so fat and unloved that you wish that death would come?
Aug 10th 2002 at 01:29:32 AM
juliet elizabeth
anti anorexia and bulimia
it's all anti anorexia and bulimia...motivation to stop, how to help friends...all put very bluntly
no
i've been battling anorexia for two years now. i was one of those people who went on to anorexicweb.com just for the triggers...i disregarded the messages. i never read any of the text. one day i came to the site and found a link. it was to this website. i clicked it, and thought the music was pretty, so i stayed. when i saw the picture of you in 1995, my heart sunk...such a beautiful woman. when i saw your baby picture, my heart pretty much broke. but when i saw your picture of you as a child, i broke down and cried... you looked so happy, so unaware of what was going to happen to you.
you have shown me what anorexia and bulimia will do. instead of ana killing me, i am killing ana. thank you for sharing your story. thank you so much.
may you rest in peace, shanda. you truly are an angel.
Aug 4th 2002 at 02:52:50 PM
Shannon and Steph
No
ILLINOIS
We think that this is very sad. I don't see how anyone could do that to there body. It leads to a painful and horibble death. I would rather be fat then look like some of these people.
Aug 1st 2002 at 11:09:44 PM
Shantel
I guess you could call me an online friend
the Northwest
Wow ! This site helped me realize how painful ( for you and your loved ones)& deadly anorexia is . R.I.P. Shanda ! We love you ![:)][o:)]